My favorite day of the year!
Happy H-day to you and yours!
Sunday, October 31, 2004
Saturday, October 30, 2004
YAY SOX!!!!
Once more, congrats to my beloved Red Sox. YANKEES SUCK!
*******************************
Q: What do you call 25 people watching the World Series?
A: Yankees
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Did you hear that the Post Office just recalled their latest stamps? They had pictures of Yankees players on them ...people couldn't figure out which side to spit on.
*******************************
Q: What's the biggest challenge for the Yankees marketing department?
A: Literacy!
*****************************
Three baseball fans leave the stadium after a game and come across a dead, naked man with breasts lying in the middle of the street. After they call the cops, they each take off their baseball caps and place them on the dead man out of respect and to cover his private parts until the cops arrive.
The first fan places his Boston Red Sox cap over his left breast, the second places his Phillies cap on his right breast and the third fan places his Yankees cap on his pubic area.
The cops finally arrive, and the officers take statements from the fans to find out what happened. After explaining that they found his naked and covered him up with their caps, the cop went over to examine the body. He briefly lifted the Red Sox cap, and quickly replaced it; then he lifted the Phillies cap, and also quickly replaced it.
However, when he lifted the Yankees cap, he stared and stared for what seemed to be two or three minutes. Finally, he let the cap drop, walked away, wrote in his notebook, then returned and lifted the Yankees cap once again and stared for a long time.
As he was walking away the second time, the fans were curious and stopped him and asked him why he spent so much time looking at the man's genitalia, and he said, "It's the first time I've seen anything but an asshole under a Yankees cap."
*****************************************
"The Yankees are the French of Major League Baseball...."
******************************************
Yankees slugger Darryl Strawberry fouled a pitch off his foot on Sunday and now has a crack in his big toe. This is the first time that the name Strawberry and the word crack were used in the same sentence without it ending with his suspension.
********************************************
Did you hear about Yankee stadium falling apart?
A huge beam fell through the deteriorating roof. In fact, this was the first time the Yankees have had a problem with crack without it resulting in the suspension of a player.
*****************************************
A Boston Red Sox fan, a Chicago Cubs fan and a NY Yankees fan were all in Saudi Arabia performing military duty for the US Army.
While off base, they were caught sharing a smuggled case of booze. All of a sudden Saudi police rushed in and arrested them. The mere possession of alcohol is a sever offense in Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime they were sentenced to death!
With the help of good lawyers, they were able to successfully appeal their sentence down to life imprisonment.
By a stroke of luck, a benevolent Sheik decided that they could be released after receiving just 20 lashes of the whip.
As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheik said, "It's my 1st wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each one of you one wish before your whipping".
The cubs fan was 1st in line (he had drunk the least), so he thought about this for a while and then said, "Please tie a pillow to my back." This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip went through. The cubs fan was carried away bleeding and crying.
The Yankees fan was up next (he almost finished an entire 5th by himself), and after watching the scene, said "OK please fix 2 pillows to my back." But even 2 pillows could only take 15 lashes before the whip went through again, sending the Yankee fan crying like a baby.
The Red Sox fan was the last up ( he had finished off the crate), but before he could say anything, the Sheik turned to him and said "you support the greatest baseball team in the world, your supporters are the best and most loyal fans in all the world. For this you may have 2 wishes"
"Thanks, your most royal highness'" the Red Sox fan replied.
"In recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that you give me not 20, but 100 lashes".
"Not only are you an honorable, powerful man, you are also very brave," said the Sheik. "If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And your second wish? What is it to be?" the Shiek asks..
To which the Red Sox fan replied... "Tie the Yankee fan to my back."
*****************************************
Four baseball fans, each from a major league city, are climbing a mountain.
On the way to the top, each is arguing about how loyal they are to their team and what they would do for their team.
As the climb progresses, the odds increase. Upon reaching the top, the Mets fan shouts, "This is for the Mets," and hurls himself off the top.
Next the Brave fan yells, "I love Atlanta, this is for the Braves," and hurls himself off the mountain.
Suddenly the Red Sox fan yells "This is for everyone," and pushes the Yankees fan off .
******************************
Albert Einstein arrives at a party and introduces himself to the first person he sees and asks, "What is your IQ?"
The man answers, "241."
"That is wonderful!" says Albert. "We will talk about the Grand Unification Theory and the mysteries of the universe. We will have much to discuss!"
Next, Albert introduces himself to a woman and asks, "What is your IQ?"
The lady answers, "144."
"That is great!", says Albert, "We can discuss politics and current affairs. We will have much to discuss!".
Albert then goes to another person and asks, "What is your IQ?"
The person answers, "51."
Albert ponders this for a moment, and then smiles and says,
"GO YANKEES"!!
*********************************
Olympics in New York
(Not so much about the Yankees, but it sure explains the fans)
In an attempt to influence the members of the International Olympic Committee on their choice of venue for the games in the year 2020, the organizers of New York City's bid have already drawn up an itinerary and schedule of events.
A copy has been obtained and is reproduced below.
OPENING CEREMONY
The Olympic flame will be ignited by a gasloine bomb thrown by a native of the city (preferably from the northern Manhanttan area), wearing the traditional costume of leather jacket, Yankee baseball cap and tattoo. It will burn for the duration of the games in a large armored truck sitting on the roof of the stadium.
THE EVENTS
In previous Olympic games, New Yorkers have not been particularly successful. In order to redress the balance, some of the events have been altered slightly to the advantage of athletes from NYC. These include:
* 100 METRES SPRINT *
Competitors will have to hold a VCR and a car stereo (one in each arm) and on the sound of the starting gun, a police dog will be released from a cage 10 yards behind the athletes.
* 400 METRES HURDLES *
As above but with added obstacles (ie. taxicabs, trash cans, backyard fences, shopping carts, ... etc.)
* HIGH JUMP *
Barbed wires like those used in state jails are added, electrifying is optional.
* HAMMER THROW *
Competitors in this event may choose the type of hammer they wish to use (claw, sledge etc) the winner will be the one who can cause the most grevious bodily harm to members of the public within the time allowed.
* FENCING *
Crow bars, broken beer bottles and batons are used instead of swords.
* SHOOTING *
A strong challenge is expected from the local men in this event. The first target will be a moving armored truck. In the second round, competitors will aim at a post office clerk, bank teller or Stop 'N Go cashier. The final round requires competitors sitting inside a car and driving by a residential area to shoot at their targets.
* BOXING *
Entry to the boxing will be restricted to husband and wife teams, and will take place on a Super Bowl night. The husband will be given a bottle of wine while the wife will be told not to bring him any corkscrew when the New York Jets has just lost a touchdown. The bout will then commence.
* WRESTLING *
DWI and bomber suspects are to be let loose for 30 seconds before law enforcement officers storm in. Batons and handcuffs are not allowed in this event.
* CYCLING TIME TRIALS *
Competitors will be asked to go to a college campus and steal an expensive mountain bike owned by a hillbilly on his first trip away from home. All against the clock.
* CYCLING PURSUIT *
As above but the bike will be owned by a defensive line backer of the New York Jets, who will witness the theft.
* MODERN PENTATHLON *
Amended to include mugging, breaking-in, flashing, purse snapping and drug delivering.
* THE MARATHON *
A safe route has yet to be decided since it is not likely held in the Central Park. The competitors will be issued with sharp sticks and bags with which to pick up litter on their way round the course.
* SWIMMING *
Competitors will choose to be either thrown off from the Brooklyn bridge or thrown into the Whitewater. The first three survivors back will decide the medals.
* MENS 50KM WALK *
Unfortunately this will have to be cancelled as the police cannot guarantee the safety of anyone walking the streets of Manhattan.
THE CLOSING CEREMONY
Entertainment will include formation rave dancing by members from the drug dealers, abortion advocates and gay & lesbian groups, sychronized rock throwing and music by the Army Sex Scandal Band.
The Olympic flame will be extinguished by someone dropping an old washing machine onto it from the top floor of the apartment building next to the stadium.
The stadium will be then boarded up before the local athletes break into it and remove all the copper piping and wiring, and the equipment such as the PA system, scoreboard, big screen ... etc.
********************************
A father and son are outside Fenway Park, and the young son is asking his father to buy him a "Yankees Suck" T-shirt. The father hesitates, but finally tells his son, "You can have the shirt if you promise never to say that word."
"That's right," says the T-shirt vendor, wanting to make the sale. "'Suck' isn't a very nice word."
"No," replies the father. "I meant the word 'Yankees'."
**********************************
On the first day of school a first grade teacher explains to her class that she is a Yankees fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they, too, are Yankees fans.
Wanting to impress their teacher, everyone in the class raises their hand except one little girl.
The teacher looks at the girl with surprise and says, "Janie, why didn't you raise your hand?"
"Because I'm not a Yankees fan," she replied.
The teacher, still shocked, asked, "Well, if you are not a Yankees fan, then who are you a fan of?"
"I am a Red Sox fan, and proud of it," Janie replied.
The teacher could not believe her ears. "Janie, why pray tell are you a Red Sox fan?"
"Because my mom is a Red Sox fan, and my dad is Red Sox fan, so I'm a Red Sox fan too!"
"Well," said the teacher in a obviously annoyed tone, "that is no reason for you to be a Red Sox fan. You don't have to be just like your parents all of the time. What if your mom were an idiot and your dad were a moron, what would you be then?"
"Then," Janie smiled, "I'd be a Yankees fan."
********************************
Two boys are playing hockey on the Boston Common pond when one is attacked by a vicious rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy takes his hockey stick and scares the dog off, stopping the attack. A reporter who is strolling by sees the incident and rushes over to interview the boy.
"Young Bruins fan saves friend from vicious animal..." he starts writing in his notebook.
"But I'm not a Bruins fan," the little boy replies.
"Sorry. Since we're in Boston, I just assumed you were," says the reporter and starts again. "Red Sox fan rescues friend from horrific attack...” he continues writing in his notebook.
"I'm not a Red Sox fan either!" the boy says.
"So, what team do you root for?" the reporter asks.
"I'm a Yankees fan!" the child beames.
The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes: "Little brat from New York kills beloved family pet."
Happy Devil's Night
I have a bad case of Election Fever. Symptoms include: profuse vomiting, anal bleeding, and splitting migraines.
Ah.... not my joke, but still funny.
Ok, it's time for another edition of That's News To Me.
First of all, I'm going to have to confiscate the Rubik's Cube in Lounge B. Not because I can't solve it, but because the Department of Homeland Security thinks its dangerous... all joking aside, aren't they supposed to be fighting terrorism, not enforcing copyright law? Look out Kazaa, you're next!
And while we got the RIAA up and running with guns in hand, they need to come to the aid of John Hall, a former Democratic county legislator in upstate New York, who co-wrote "Still the One" and is trying to block Bush from using it at campaign events!
Hunter S. Thompson is back! That is a link to his newest article in Rolling Stone. Read it!
Don't believe our President wore a wire during the debates? Well, a NASA Photo Analysist is willing to stake his career on it. He says he did and he has evidence.
While even FOX news admits that Bush's poll numbers went down after the Bin Laden tapes aired, his camp is just GIDDY that they have failed to either capture or kill Osama Bin Laden.
Now, why the hell we'd want to reward the incompetance of the Bush administration is beyond me...
NEWS FLASH: even Evangelicals won't vote Bush in '04!
A follow up on Mister O'Reilly: our favorite bigot has settled his sexual harassment lawsuit out of court for an undisclosed amount, joining the ranks of innocent celebrities like Kobe Bryant and Michael Jackson. If the condom doesn't fit, you must acquit!
In good news, the FBI will expand an earlier inquiry into whether Halliburton overcharged taxpayers for fuel in Iraq.
And the blogosphere is all afire with poll data. Seems Kerry is doing well. It's going to be close no matter what and it's going to go to court. So, a good question was raised. What *does* happen if they haven't sorted it out by 1/20?
Ah.... not my joke, but still funny.
Ok, it's time for another edition of That's News To Me.
First of all, I'm going to have to confiscate the Rubik's Cube in Lounge B. Not because I can't solve it, but because the Department of Homeland Security thinks its dangerous... all joking aside, aren't they supposed to be fighting terrorism, not enforcing copyright law? Look out Kazaa, you're next!
And while we got the RIAA up and running with guns in hand, they need to come to the aid of John Hall, a former Democratic county legislator in upstate New York, who co-wrote "Still the One" and is trying to block Bush from using it at campaign events!
Hunter S. Thompson is back! That is a link to his newest article in Rolling Stone. Read it!
The question this year is not whether President Bush is acting more and more like the head of a fascist government but if the American people want it that way. That is what this election is all about. We are down to nut-cutting time, and millions of people are angry. They want a Regime Change.
Don't believe our President wore a wire during the debates? Well, a NASA Photo Analysist is willing to stake his career on it. He says he did and he has evidence.
While even FOX news admits that Bush's poll numbers went down after the Bin Laden tapes aired, his camp is just GIDDY that they have failed to either capture or kill Osama Bin Laden.
"We want people to think 'terrorism' for the last four days," said a Bush-Cheney campaign official. "And anything that raises the issue in people's minds is good for us."
A senior GOP strategist added, "anything that makes people nervous about their personal safety helps Bush."
He called it "a little gift," saying it helps the President but doesn't guarantee his reelection.
Now, why the hell we'd want to reward the incompetance of the Bush administration is beyond me...
NEWS FLASH: even Evangelicals won't vote Bush in '04!
A follow up on Mister O'Reilly: our favorite bigot has settled his sexual harassment lawsuit out of court for an undisclosed amount, joining the ranks of innocent celebrities like Kobe Bryant and Michael Jackson. If the condom doesn't fit, you must acquit!
In good news, the FBI will expand an earlier inquiry into whether Halliburton overcharged taxpayers for fuel in Iraq.
And the blogosphere is all afire with poll data. Seems Kerry is doing well. It's going to be close no matter what and it's going to go to court. So, a good question was raised. What *does* happen if they haven't sorted it out by 1/20?
Friday, October 29, 2004
Bin Forgotten is back
Much to the surprise of conspiracy theorists and staunch republicans the world around, Osama Bin Laden released another tape just 4 short days before the election. He told US citizens that it doesn't matter who we elect as president. What matters is we stay out of the affairs of Muslim nations and don't threaten their security. He said ordered the 9/11 attacks because of injustices against the Lebanese and Palestinians by Israel and the United States.
So......... can we just go back to the isolationist policies of pre-Pearl Harbor WWII and just concern ourselves with our own nation, please? I'd rather be safe than the police of the world, kay? Thanks. Neogotiating with terrorists this is not. Just let the Muslim world do it's own thing.
Oh, fuck. I forgot. They have the oil. Never mind, the SUVs demand we must continue the 30-year plan.
DRILL ALASKA!
So......... can we just go back to the isolationist policies of pre-Pearl Harbor WWII and just concern ourselves with our own nation, please? I'd rather be safe than the police of the world, kay? Thanks. Neogotiating with terrorists this is not. Just let the Muslim world do it's own thing.
Oh, fuck. I forgot. They have the oil. Never mind, the SUVs demand we must continue the 30-year plan.
DRILL ALASKA!
Thursday, October 21, 2004
And that's news to me
Here is another edition of news snippetts from around the web for ya'll to peruse:
The white washing of whitehouse.gov
Blogger Brad Friedman has been tracking the efforts of white house staffers to remove all embarassing content from the white house website.
Bush on Pat Robertson: FUCK OFF AND DIE, FATTIE!
That's right, Dubya is not a fan of Pat Robertson these days.
Tenet: the war in Iraq is wrong
According to aMichigan Herald Palladium article, ex-CIA chief George Tenet called the Iraq war wronf while speaking to The Economic Club of Southwestern Michigan.
Iraq and Afganistan
An absolute must read from the Washington Post.
Republicans for Kerry
Kind of like Jews for Jesus, there are a whole host of Republicans for Kerry who are publically declaring their support. Thanks to the DailyKos.com for the list!
No democrats on the ballot!
Another gem found on the Kos, a DuPage County Sample Ballot left the Democratic challenger for the 6th District, Christine Cegelis, off the ballot.
Bush's approval on terror shrinking
It is news to anyone the people do not think the President has done a good job protecting us? If it's news to you, check out the article.
Don't go to school
Proving how much Dubya wants you to go to school, this piece from the New York Times elaborates on his damage to higher education.
Draft rumors continue
Proving that a good October surprise won't die, draft rumors continue to circulate.
Nevermind that a study by the Pentagon found the number of troops to be lacking.
Condi Rice: protecting us from democrats the nation over
From the Kerry Camp
1) ALL OF RICE'S VISITS ARE TO SWING STATES
After this week, Rice will have given nine political speeches in two months - ALL in battleground states.
2) RICE DID NOT VISIT SWING STATES PRIOR TO THIS YEAR
In previous years, Condi Rice delivered her "outside-the-beltway" speeches in major metropolitan areas like Chicago and New York or understandable locations like her home state of California or Bush's home state of Texas. Recently, her travels have taken her to Oregon, Washington, North Carolina, Ohio, and Pennsylvania.
3) RICE RARELY LEFT DC BEFORE THIS YEAR
In September and October of 2001, 2002, and 2003, Rice gave two or fewer speeches outside Washington.
4) RICE'S POLITICAL ACTIVITY IS UNPRECEDENTED
In the past, National Security Advisers have not given more than a couple speeches during presidential election season, and none have traveled into the field to make their boss's case as Condi has done.
Fuck the French... unless we get the flu
We're keeping 'Freedom Fries' but we'll take french French Flu Vaccines? Bullshit... and in further bullshititry, our Congress is making sure to vaccinate itself, even while the nation is waiting for these drugs.
Isreal: faith against millitary might
Quite a striking piece from the Christian Science monitor. In Isreal, soldiers are opposing their orders, refusing to remove Palistians refuguees from their homes.
The white washing of whitehouse.gov
Blogger Brad Friedman has been tracking the efforts of white house staffers to remove all embarassing content from the white house website.
Bush on Pat Robertson: FUCK OFF AND DIE, FATTIE!
That's right, Dubya is not a fan of Pat Robertson these days.
"Robertson, in an interview with CNN that aired Tuesday night, said God had told him the war would be messy and a disaster. When he met with Bush in Nashville, Tenn., before the war Bush did not listen to his advice, Robertson said, and believed Saddam Hussein was an evil tyrant who needed to be removed.
"He was just sitting there, like, 'I'm on top of the world,' and I warned him about this war," Robertson said.
"I had deep misgivings about this war, deep misgivings. And I was trying to say, 'Mr. President, you better prepare the American people for casualties.' 'Oh, no, we're not going to have any casualties.' 'Well,' I said, 'it's the way it's going to be.' And so, it was messy. The Lord told me it was going to be, A, a disaster and, B, messy."
Tenet: the war in Iraq is wrong
According to aMichigan Herald Palladium article, ex-CIA chief George Tenet called the Iraq war wronf while speaking to The Economic Club of Southwestern Michigan.
Iraq and Afganistan
An absolute must read from the Washington Post.
Republicans for Kerry
Kind of like Jews for Jesus, there are a whole host of Republicans for Kerry who are publically declaring their support. Thanks to the DailyKos.com for the list!
No democrats on the ballot!
Another gem found on the Kos, a DuPage County Sample Ballot left the Democratic challenger for the 6th District, Christine Cegelis, off the ballot.
Bush's approval on terror shrinking
It is news to anyone the people do not think the President has done a good job protecting us? If it's news to you, check out the article.
Don't go to school
Proving how much Dubya wants you to go to school, this piece from the New York Times elaborates on his damage to higher education.
"Tuition at the nation's public universities rose an average of 10.5 percent this year, the second-largest increase in more than a decade, according to the annual survey released today by the College Board. Last year's rise, 13 percent, was the highest.
Private universities and community colleges also increased tuition -- by 6 percent and 9 percent respectively, in a year when inflation has been hovering at about 2.5 percent. The tuition increases at private and community colleges were also among the steepest in a decade."
Draft rumors continue
Proving that a good October surprise won't die, draft rumors continue to circulate.
Nevermind that a study by the Pentagon found the number of troops to be lacking.
Condi Rice: protecting us from democrats the nation over
From the Kerry Camp
1) ALL OF RICE'S VISITS ARE TO SWING STATES
After this week, Rice will have given nine political speeches in two months - ALL in battleground states.
2) RICE DID NOT VISIT SWING STATES PRIOR TO THIS YEAR
In previous years, Condi Rice delivered her "outside-the-beltway" speeches in major metropolitan areas like Chicago and New York or understandable locations like her home state of California or Bush's home state of Texas. Recently, her travels have taken her to Oregon, Washington, North Carolina, Ohio, and Pennsylvania.
3) RICE RARELY LEFT DC BEFORE THIS YEAR
In September and October of 2001, 2002, and 2003, Rice gave two or fewer speeches outside Washington.
4) RICE'S POLITICAL ACTIVITY IS UNPRECEDENTED
In the past, National Security Advisers have not given more than a couple speeches during presidential election season, and none have traveled into the field to make their boss's case as Condi has done.
Fuck the French... unless we get the flu
We're keeping 'Freedom Fries' but we'll take french French Flu Vaccines? Bullshit... and in further bullshititry, our Congress is making sure to vaccinate itself, even while the nation is waiting for these drugs.
Isreal: faith against millitary might
Quite a striking piece from the Christian Science monitor. In Isreal, soldiers are opposing their orders, refusing to remove Palistians refuguees from their homes.
Wednesday, October 20, 2004
As if oil prices weren't already high enough...
From the Economist
Frozen by oil-price fears
The word petroleum has its roots in the Latin words oleum, which means oil, and petra, which means rock. The word petrified has the same root. As the price of oleum has soared, the links between fear and petroleum have become clear to economists as well as etymologists. …
When the oil price started to catch everyone’s attention in the spring, economists tried to put things in perspective. Prices would have to pass $80 per barrel in today’s money to match the oil-price peaks of 1981 in real (inflation-adjusted) terms, they pointed out. Besides, oil-consuming nations now use about half as much oil for every dollar of output as they did in the 1970s. Economists cited a common rule of thumb: a sustained $10 increase in the price of oil would knock 0.4% off the GDP of the rich, oil-consuming nations of the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development. It would cost America just 0.3% of GDP. A drag, but not a shock.
But as the price has continued to rise, these historical comparisons have looked less comforting. Moreover, economists are now worried that their rough-and-ready rule may not be linear: that is, a rise in the oil price from $45 to $55 may be more damaging than a rise from $25 to $35. Increasingly, economists are abandoning their rules of thumb and crossing their fingers instead.
If oil prices stay high in the year to come, might interest rates stay low? Most central banks around the world, with the notable exception of the European Central Bank, have set off on a course of monetary tightening. But they may stop, pause or delay along the way to cushion the impact of higher oil prices. Mr Greenspan gave no hint of such a pause on Friday. The problem is that oil-price shocks raise inflation even as they dampen demand. If workers press for higher wages to compensate for higher energy bills, an inflationary spiral can ensue. Central banks are thus reluctant to ease monetary policy in response to an oil-price shock, even one that slows the economy.
The “stagflation” (economic stagnation alongside roaring inflation) that was common in the 1970s is now a worry once again. But inflation remains at bay, for the moment at least. It would thus be too much to say that consumers and central bankers are petrified by petroleum. But as the price of oil sets new records, their rock-like confidence is beginning to crumble.
Why it is imperative to vote
So, you live in California and it's definitely going to Kerry. You live in Texas and it's definitely going to Bush. You live in Florida and, in case you haven’t noticed, the fate of the free world rests on your shoulders.
It doesn't matter where you live or how solid the results of the 2004 presidential race may or may not be. You must go out and vote.
Why?
Because if you ever want any politician to listen to your issues, you must first stand up and voice what they are. If the 18-26 block wants politicians to pay attention to them, they must get out en masse on November 2nd. Groups carefully track who votes for what in what numbers. Why do you think Democrats pander to the black community the way the do? Because when that block votes, it votes in large numbers for democratic candidates and causes. It is in their interest to address the needs of this group to keep themselves in office.
Whatever your age, your race, you income bracket, sexual orientation, gender, or whatever other way you want to break yourself down, you must go out and represent your interests.
Secondly, if all the supporters of Bush or Kerry decided not to go out and vote, a state that is a 'lock' could slip away. With Gore losing the electoral college by 500 votes, every vote matters. It always does.
Third, if this is your first election, you must vote. Statistics show that if you don’t vote by age 25, most likely you won't.
Fourth, there are a whole host of local and state issues and candidates that you need to be aware and involved in.
So please, no matter who you are voting for, get out there on November 2nd and do it.
It doesn't matter where you live or how solid the results of the 2004 presidential race may or may not be. You must go out and vote.
Why?
Because if you ever want any politician to listen to your issues, you must first stand up and voice what they are. If the 18-26 block wants politicians to pay attention to them, they must get out en masse on November 2nd. Groups carefully track who votes for what in what numbers. Why do you think Democrats pander to the black community the way the do? Because when that block votes, it votes in large numbers for democratic candidates and causes. It is in their interest to address the needs of this group to keep themselves in office.
Whatever your age, your race, you income bracket, sexual orientation, gender, or whatever other way you want to break yourself down, you must go out and represent your interests.
Secondly, if all the supporters of Bush or Kerry decided not to go out and vote, a state that is a 'lock' could slip away. With Gore losing the electoral college by 500 votes, every vote matters. It always does.
Third, if this is your first election, you must vote. Statistics show that if you don’t vote by age 25, most likely you won't.
Fourth, there are a whole host of local and state issues and candidates that you need to be aware and involved in.
So please, no matter who you are voting for, get out there on November 2nd and do it.
Create your own paper trail
My mother had a good idea this afternoon. For those of you living in states, like Florida, that use a touch screen polling device with no paper trail, create your own! Write down who you voted for and get someone at the polls to sign and date it. Or mail yourself a letter saying who you voted for. That way, if the election results do end up screwy, we have proof.
Get the word out!
Get the word out!
Tuesday, October 19, 2004
Sunday, October 17, 2004
Hell looks a lot like LA
This is how I know I've become WAY to goddamn acclimated to LA:
It fucking POURED tonight! The parking lot was a lake and I was bitching about how much I fucking hate the goddamn rain... yet when I went 70 down Vineland to get home, I could still have my wipers on the lowest setting and see perfectly.
That's pouring.
It's in the 70s and I'm wearing sweaters.
What the fuck I am going to do when I go home?
It fucking POURED tonight! The parking lot was a lake and I was bitching about how much I fucking hate the goddamn rain... yet when I went 70 down Vineland to get home, I could still have my wipers on the lowest setting and see perfectly.
That's pouring.
It's in the 70s and I'm wearing sweaters.
What the fuck I am going to do when I go home?
Saturday, October 16, 2004
You can't be numb to this
If you can read this without being sickened and saddened, you're stronger than me... you're also a heartless ass.
What are the issues? Where are the tissues?
The Kos has some good thoughts on what the main issues are in this election. Not just draft fears, but outsourcing, oil prices, and the critical issue of the flu shot are keeping things tight in battle ground areas.
Anyone else noticed that oil prices at the pump don't match the skyrocketing prices of crude? Who has the big oil companies in their pocket? Yeah, that's what I figured.
We invaded the largest known oil reserve in the world and we're still paying $2.25 or more for our Black Gold? What is imperialism good for if not improving the quality of life for the conquerers? Wait, I forget that I am not an Inner Party Member... DAMN YOU MINISTRY OF TRUTH!!!!!!
Did I just mention MiniTru? Well, check this out. No, its mot a link to the Information Awareness Office [I love them so] but a link talking about how the Republican party punished the Republicans who got fired for voter fraud in South Dakota... by giving them jobs in Ohio.
And now onto news about our broad and unshakable global popularity...
First, our main ally in the War on Loosely Defined Ideology is getting a lot of flack about shifting troops in Iraq.
That is a quote from Shadow Defence Secretary Nicholas Soames who has what can be considered one of the coolest titles in history.
British soldiers serving under American command? That sets up an interesting precedent... what if the UN wanted to send in trooops but wanted command over US forces? Does the US get command over everyone? Why is it like this solely in Iraq or is it? Is it a foriegn occupation? Uh oh...
And that is not all. A ten country poll shows our reputation plummeting overseas. I'm sorry, Mister President, but there is a global test. You want to know why? Because there is a global market that we are reliant upon for economic survival and a global community that we expect to stand with us in offence and defense of our nation. I don't know about you, but I want the EU on our fucking side the next time you decide that "yippe-kay-yay motherfuckers" is a well-thought out foriegn policy.
This is a great article from the LA Times about George Bush's tax record. "Kerry raised taxes 98 times over 20 years? That's nothing. Bush is about to do the same 63 times in a single day."
And then there is Iraq where it's nothing but rosebods, or so the Bush camp is saying. But in the real world, there are 1,092 dead soldiers [34 in the last two weeks alone] and they are arrestingentire platoons.
This article from the Post made me giggle a bit.
And that is the news to me.
Anyone else noticed that oil prices at the pump don't match the skyrocketing prices of crude? Who has the big oil companies in their pocket? Yeah, that's what I figured.
We invaded the largest known oil reserve in the world and we're still paying $2.25 or more for our Black Gold? What is imperialism good for if not improving the quality of life for the conquerers? Wait, I forget that I am not an Inner Party Member... DAMN YOU MINISTRY OF TRUTH!!!!!!
Did I just mention MiniTru? Well, check this out. No, its mot a link to the Information Awareness Office [I love them so] but a link talking about how the Republican party punished the Republicans who got fired for voter fraud in South Dakota... by giving them jobs in Ohio.
And now onto news about our broad and unshakable global popularity...
First, our main ally in the War on Loosely Defined Ideology is getting a lot of flack about shifting troops in Iraq.
""The question of chain of command is an extremely important one. I've no objection to British troops serving under American command but it needs to be extremely clearly worked out."
That is a quote from Shadow Defence Secretary Nicholas Soames who has what can be considered one of the coolest titles in history.
British soldiers serving under American command? That sets up an interesting precedent... what if the UN wanted to send in trooops but wanted command over US forces? Does the US get command over everyone? Why is it like this solely in Iraq or is it? Is it a foriegn occupation? Uh oh...
And that is not all. A ten country poll shows our reputation plummeting overseas. I'm sorry, Mister President, but there is a global test. You want to know why? Because there is a global market that we are reliant upon for economic survival and a global community that we expect to stand with us in offence and defense of our nation. I don't know about you, but I want the EU on our fucking side the next time you decide that "yippe-kay-yay motherfuckers" is a well-thought out foriegn policy.
This is a great article from the LA Times about George Bush's tax record. "Kerry raised taxes 98 times over 20 years? That's nothing. Bush is about to do the same 63 times in a single day."
And then there is Iraq where it's nothing but rosebods, or so the Bush camp is saying. But in the real world, there are 1,092 dead soldiers [34 in the last two weeks alone] and they are arrestingentire platoons.
This article from the Post made me giggle a bit.
"For months now I've dropped bets on the presidential election like Hansel (of "Hansel and Gretel") dropped pebbles. For honor and money, I've wagered on George Bush, not because I wanted him to win but rather because I thought he would. Now I'm changing my mind. It's not the tightening polls that have done it -- I knew that would happen -- but rather something I could not have predicted. The president is missing.
The president I have in mind is the funny, good-natured regular guy I once saw on the campaign trail -- a man of surprisingly quick wit and just plain likeability. I contrasted this man to John Kerry, who is as light and as funny as a mud wall, and I thought, "There goes the election."
Where it has mattered most -- the three debates -- Bush has been wooden, ill at ease and downright spooky. He makes bad jokes, cackles at them in the manner of a cinematic serial killer and has lacked the warmth that he not only once had but that I thought would compensate for a disastrous presidency and give him a second -- God help us -- term. In short, he could take over the Bates Motel in an instant.
And that is the news to me.
Fucking activist judges protecting American freedoms!
The 11th Circuit Court of Appeals in Atlanta ruled unanimously Friday that protesters may not be required to pass through metal detectors when they gather next month for a rally against a U.S. training academy for Latin American soldiers.
Get those terrorists! And by terrorists, I mean college students. The greatest threat to our nation is higher education. That's why 'No Child Left Behind' was enacted, to ensure that we are all getting the same low quality education. Ignorance is strength!
Get those terrorists! And by terrorists, I mean college students. The greatest threat to our nation is higher education. That's why 'No Child Left Behind' was enacted, to ensure that we are all getting the same low quality education. Ignorance is strength!
Another repost of my old rants
Every time I get that fucking email, I freak out. You want to know how popular this war is? Talk about reinstating the draft. You'll get your answer.
But let's get frank about all this bullshit and whether or not it's really going to happen. First, what you need to know is the draft bill was defeated. It lost in the house by a vote of 402-2. Even the Democratic Senator who introduced it voted against it.
But what's this? Democrat, you say? Yes. The Esteemed Rep. Charles Rangel, (D-N.Y.), initiated this legislation. So, to all you branless liberals who think that the democratic party farts freedom, jizzes justice, and uses a douche of Spring Fresh Peace and Democracy - get a fucking clue! They are just as corrupt and evil as the republicans, they just have better plastics surgeons and less organizational skills!
Ahem, that rant aside, the bill has been defeated.
For now.
Yes, I am aware that both Kerry and Bush have said there will be no draft. But the global social and political climate will determine that. Not them. "Not. Gonna. Happen." The word of President W about the draft. Does the phrase 'read my lips' ring any bells? Were there no new taxes? That's right. We smashed into a depression and a war and we needed to funding for both.
As president, you do what you have to. A wonderful quote in Newsweek sums it up: "If we need to occupy another country that tratens us, we will either do it with the help of our allies or the conscriptions of our kids." There it is, point blank. The army is already stretched too thin and there is NO NO way we can win in countries that pose greater threats than Iraq without a ground occupation. We learned this in Iraq. Shock and Awe is all well and good but our troops will have to occupy the contry in ensure stability. (THat's what we're supposed to be doing in Iraq, lest you forgot. I know, it's hard to tell.)
And there are greater threats than Iraq. Consider Iran, where the radical mullahs are nearly in possession of nuclear weapons. This is a genuine threat to the peacy and secutiry of the world. Some mullahs have already openly discussed using nukes to destroy Isreal. And as everyone who isn't a US media-fed cow knows that the heart of global Islamic-driven terrorism is the Isreal-Palestine conflict. Even Musharraf conceeded and in fact pushed this point in an interview with Newsweek last week. If someone attacks Isreal, all fucking HELL is going to break loose. 30f our international spending goes into keeping people from attacking Isreal. (Acutally, it may be more... if only I had my library with me...)
So this is the deal with the draft... with National Guard recruitment down 12Àsomething has give one way or the other. Reservists as old as their 40s are being mobilized, tours extended, and soldiers have reported being blackmailed into re-uping. If not, they are immediately shipped to Iraq. Defense Secretary Rumsfeld hass pointed out that personel management can tide us over for a little while. But as Repudlican Sen. Chuck Hagel [a likely presidential candidate in 2008] said that a draft "might become necessary" in the years ahead. Apparently, Sen. Hagel has a better grasp of history than either Bush or Kerry. What we must consider is an issue of diplomacy... will hated Bush or questionable Kerry be able to revived America's battered alliances and convince (not coerce) other nations into giving us their military and financial aid. Diplomacy does work. Five years after former President Clinton's war in Kosovo 100% of the peacekeeping is handled by foriegn troops.
So what am I saying? The draft issue may be laid to rest for the rest of election season but its not over forever. So you can stop sending me that fucking retarded email and go stew in your own propoganda for a bit. But don't stop worrying about the draft because its not over and done with until the fat lady sings. (And by that I mean the Bush twins.)
But let's get frank about all this bullshit and whether or not it's really going to happen. First, what you need to know is the draft bill was defeated. It lost in the house by a vote of 402-2. Even the Democratic Senator who introduced it voted against it.
But what's this? Democrat, you say? Yes. The Esteemed Rep. Charles Rangel, (D-N.Y.), initiated this legislation. So, to all you branless liberals who think that the democratic party farts freedom, jizzes justice, and uses a douche of Spring Fresh Peace and Democracy - get a fucking clue! They are just as corrupt and evil as the republicans, they just have better plastics surgeons and less organizational skills!
Ahem, that rant aside, the bill has been defeated.
For now.
Yes, I am aware that both Kerry and Bush have said there will be no draft. But the global social and political climate will determine that. Not them. "Not. Gonna. Happen." The word of President W about the draft. Does the phrase 'read my lips' ring any bells? Were there no new taxes? That's right. We smashed into a depression and a war and we needed to funding for both.
As president, you do what you have to. A wonderful quote in Newsweek sums it up: "If we need to occupy another country that tratens us, we will either do it with the help of our allies or the conscriptions of our kids." There it is, point blank. The army is already stretched too thin and there is NO NO way we can win in countries that pose greater threats than Iraq without a ground occupation. We learned this in Iraq. Shock and Awe is all well and good but our troops will have to occupy the contry in ensure stability. (THat's what we're supposed to be doing in Iraq, lest you forgot. I know, it's hard to tell.)
And there are greater threats than Iraq. Consider Iran, where the radical mullahs are nearly in possession of nuclear weapons. This is a genuine threat to the peacy and secutiry of the world. Some mullahs have already openly discussed using nukes to destroy Isreal. And as everyone who isn't a US media-fed cow knows that the heart of global Islamic-driven terrorism is the Isreal-Palestine conflict. Even Musharraf conceeded and in fact pushed this point in an interview with Newsweek last week. If someone attacks Isreal, all fucking HELL is going to break loose. 30f our international spending goes into keeping people from attacking Isreal. (Acutally, it may be more... if only I had my library with me...)
So this is the deal with the draft... with National Guard recruitment down 12Àsomething has give one way or the other. Reservists as old as their 40s are being mobilized, tours extended, and soldiers have reported being blackmailed into re-uping. If not, they are immediately shipped to Iraq. Defense Secretary Rumsfeld hass pointed out that personel management can tide us over for a little while. But as Repudlican Sen. Chuck Hagel [a likely presidential candidate in 2008] said that a draft "might become necessary" in the years ahead. Apparently, Sen. Hagel has a better grasp of history than either Bush or Kerry. What we must consider is an issue of diplomacy... will hated Bush or questionable Kerry be able to revived America's battered alliances and convince (not coerce) other nations into giving us their military and financial aid. Diplomacy does work. Five years after former President Clinton's war in Kosovo 100% of the peacekeeping is handled by foriegn troops.
So what am I saying? The draft issue may be laid to rest for the rest of election season but its not over forever. So you can stop sending me that fucking retarded email and go stew in your own propoganda for a bit. But don't stop worrying about the draft because its not over and done with until the fat lady sings. (And by that I mean the Bush twins.)
Draft Bush Supporters First
Yes, it's back to the Democrats October Surprise: the draft.
It's become a mjor issue in this election as kids between 18 and 25 realize their vote might not just matter, it may mean the difference between life and death. And families [white suburban house wifes in particular] are beginning to waiver in their support for Bush. The poll numbers are skyrocketing and suburban mothers are all becoming single issue voters because of it. Ed Gillespie, RNC chair, has threatened Rock the Vote for using it to help spur their voter drive and also to bolster younger voters to vote for Kerry [because, let's be honest, Viacom and MTV are far from bastions of rightist propaganda]. They've responded but it's unclear what, if anything, will become of all this. Probably nothing, not before November.
This gaffe by the President is not helping matters. He said "I made it very plain we will not have an all-volunteer army." Whoops.
The Kerry camp is doing a good job of hammering away at this issue, no matter what the president says. But we, as citizens and as voters, need to remember that a draft may happen no matter who is elected. While Kerry's policy of restoring our reputation and relations with the rest of the world will help [maybe], he has not said what he will do if Iran tries to blow us up. We *can't* invade. We don't have the forces. If Iran or North Korea or fucking Romania decides to attack us, we're fucked. Point blank, there will be a draft.
To ensure this does not happen , we must keep on our elected officials from local to federal level and loudly, LOUDLY express our opposistion to this issue.
It's become a mjor issue in this election as kids between 18 and 25 realize their vote might not just matter, it may mean the difference between life and death. And families [white suburban house wifes in particular] are beginning to waiver in their support for Bush. The poll numbers are skyrocketing and suburban mothers are all becoming single issue voters because of it. Ed Gillespie, RNC chair, has threatened Rock the Vote for using it to help spur their voter drive and also to bolster younger voters to vote for Kerry [because, let's be honest, Viacom and MTV are far from bastions of rightist propaganda]. They've responded but it's unclear what, if anything, will become of all this. Probably nothing, not before November.
This gaffe by the President is not helping matters. He said "I made it very plain we will not have an all-volunteer army." Whoops.
The Kerry camp is doing a good job of hammering away at this issue, no matter what the president says. But we, as citizens and as voters, need to remember that a draft may happen no matter who is elected. While Kerry's policy of restoring our reputation and relations with the rest of the world will help [maybe], he has not said what he will do if Iran tries to blow us up. We *can't* invade. We don't have the forces. If Iran or North Korea or fucking Romania decides to attack us, we're fucked. Point blank, there will be a draft.
To ensure this does not happen , we must keep on our elected officials from local to federal level and loudly, LOUDLY express our opposistion to this issue.
Don't sass me, Bill O'Reilly!
Heard about this yet?
Scandal-hit Fox News moved yesterday to fire an employee who says she was sexually harassed by Bill O'Reilly - but wants a judge to declare the canning isn't retribution.
Andrea Mackris, 33, said she was served legal papers about her termination by a man lying in wait for her at her Manhattan apartment building.
The documents said Fox had asked a judge to let the TV station dump her from a $93,200-a-year job as associate producer on "The O'Reilly Factor" - and to rule that the firing was not in retaliation for her accusations about the show's host.
Scandal-hit Fox News moved yesterday to fire an employee who says she was sexually harassed by Bill O'Reilly - but wants a judge to declare the canning isn't retribution.
Andrea Mackris, 33, said she was served legal papers about her termination by a man lying in wait for her at her Manhattan apartment building.
The documents said Fox had asked a judge to let the TV station dump her from a $93,200-a-year job as associate producer on "The O'Reilly Factor" - and to rule that the firing was not in retaliation for her accusations about the show's host.
Truth has an attitude
Check out the pictures from last Wednesday's Free Speech Day organized by the Freeway Blogger.
There are tons more on the site. Check it out!
There are tons more on the site. Check it out!
Zombie is more hardcore with an 'X'
I have a new obsession, one that must go to the Zombie King Himself... Xombie!
Me wants it, precious.
Me wants it, precious.
DIY Bumfights and other assorted nonsense
I can't spend every second of my life ranting, can I? Some of those seconds have to be spent killing things in a digital setting. So, time to link spam out some net fun. Go play, kidz.
Hobowars: Go and get your own homeless dude and experience the magic! You get to beg for change, buy weapons, go to school, and even fight other bums! It's just like the music industry with better liquor!
The Emo Game: If you haven't played it, you need to. There are sequels now.
Newgrounds: The problems of the future... today!
I love bacon: All the stupidity you can eat.
And of course...
Camp Chaos: FUCKING LARS ULRICH HERE, GO!
Hobowars: Go and get your own homeless dude and experience the magic! You get to beg for change, buy weapons, go to school, and even fight other bums! It's just like the music industry with better liquor!
The Emo Game: If you haven't played it, you need to. There are sequels now.
Newgrounds: The problems of the future... today!
I love bacon: All the stupidity you can eat.
And of course...
Camp Chaos: FUCKING LARS ULRICH HERE, GO!
Friday, October 15, 2004
Jon Stewart: the best in real news
My admiration level for John Stewart has just gone through the roof. Check out this transcript of him just tearing into the CROSSFIRE idiots.
Some great quotes:
"I made a special effort to come on the show today, because I have privately, amongst my friends and also in occasional newspapers and television shows, mentioned this show as being bad. And I wanted to -- I felt that that wasn't fair and I should come here and tell you that I don't -- it's not so much that it's bad, as it's hurting America."
"You are partisan, what do you call it... hacks."
"You know, it's interesting to hear you talk about my responsibility. I didn't realize that -- and maybe this explains quite a bit -- is that the news organizations look to Comedy Central for their cues on integrity."
I love that man!
Some great quotes:
"I made a special effort to come on the show today, because I have privately, amongst my friends and also in occasional newspapers and television shows, mentioned this show as being bad. And I wanted to -- I felt that that wasn't fair and I should come here and tell you that I don't -- it's not so much that it's bad, as it's hurting America."
"You are partisan, what do you call it... hacks."
"You know, it's interesting to hear you talk about my responsibility. I didn't realize that -- and maybe this explains quite a bit -- is that the news organizations look to Comedy Central for their cues on integrity."
I love that man!
The Faith-Based Presidency
If you don't read the whole New York Times article, just mull over this quote:
In the summer of 2002, after I had written an article in Esquire that the White House didn't like about Bush's former communications director, Karen Hughes, I had a meeting with a senior adviser to Bush. He expressed the White House's displeasure, and then he told me something that at the time I didn't fully comprehend -- but which I now believe gets to the very heart of the Bush presidency.
The aide said that guys like me were ''in what we call the reality-based community,'' which he defined as people who ''believe that solutions emerge from your judicious study of discernible reality.'' I nodded and murmured something about enlightenment principles and empiricism. He cut me off. ''That's not the way the world really works anymore,'' he continued. ''We're an empire now, and when we act, we create our own reality. And while you're studying that reality -- judiciously, as you will -- we'll act again, creating other new realities, which you can study too, and that's how things will sort out. We're history's actors . . . and you, all of you, will be left to just study what we do.''
And just remember that accounts at the NYT are free and sans spam, so I highly recomend them.
In the summer of 2002, after I had written an article in Esquire that the White House didn't like about Bush's former communications director, Karen Hughes, I had a meeting with a senior adviser to Bush. He expressed the White House's displeasure, and then he told me something that at the time I didn't fully comprehend -- but which I now believe gets to the very heart of the Bush presidency.
The aide said that guys like me were ''in what we call the reality-based community,'' which he defined as people who ''believe that solutions emerge from your judicious study of discernible reality.'' I nodded and murmured something about enlightenment principles and empiricism. He cut me off. ''That's not the way the world really works anymore,'' he continued. ''We're an empire now, and when we act, we create our own reality. And while you're studying that reality -- judiciously, as you will -- we'll act again, creating other new realities, which you can study too, and that's how things will sort out. We're history's actors . . . and you, all of you, will be left to just study what we do.''
And just remember that accounts at the NYT are free and sans spam, so I highly recomend them.
Thursday, October 14, 2004
100s of democratic voter registration forms destroyed
You know it's true when you get it off FOX News... although they did a good job of trying to discredit the sources...
WASHINGTON — As the election approaches, the catalogue of complaints about registration and voting irregularities is already growing.
Democrats on Wednesday cried foul over a company hired by the Republican National Committee that stands accused of shredding hundreds of voter registration forms filled out by Democrats in Las Vegas.
"Why is the Republican National Committee funding an organization who is ripping up voter registration forms of Democrats?" asked Democratic National Committee Chairman Terry McAuliffe.
A report by Las Vegas television station KLAS-TV quoted company employees who said they witnessed the destruction of hundreds of forms from potential Democratic voters. The head of the elections division in Clark County, where the allegations surfaced, said he saw photocopies of three voter registration forms that had been shredded and then taped back together. Of the three, one person was already registered to vote in the county.
Nevada's secretary of state is investigating the allegations.
The RNC confirmed to FOX News that it had paid the company to register voters. It also released this statement: "The Republican Party has a zero tolerance policy for anything that smacks of improprieties in registering voters. Anyone who engages in fraudulent voter registration activities should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law."
Nathan Sproul, an Arizona Republican, told FOX News that he was paid nearly $500,000 by the Republican National Committee to register voters. He subcontracted Voter Outreach of America (search), among other organizations, to get the job done in Arizona, Nevada and Oregon. Sproul said all of the subcontractors' employees are required to read and sign a "fraud policy" form that explains that tampering with a registration form is a felony and anyone found doing it will be turned over to authorities.
Sproul said all the charges are false and generated by one disgruntled employee who was fired two weeks ago for lying about the number of hours he worked. He said his company took out 4,500 blank voter registration forms in Clark County, Nev., and submitted 2,400 forms. Of those, 1,947 were registered Republican; the rest were Democratic and independent registration forms.
In Oregon, the state attorney general is investigating a similar complaint. A man who claimed to be an employee of Voter Outreach of America told a reporter for KGW-TV that he "might" throw away the forms of people who registered as Democrats. He said he was from the company's "Nevada organization." Sproul said he does not believe Mike Johnson, the man making the accusations, ever worked for the company.
The penalty for "altering" a voter registration form in Oregon is up to five years in prison and a $120,000 fine. Secretary of State Bill Bradbury (search) told FOX News that in his five years in office, he has never seen a complaint like this. Oregon has recently seen a huge increase in registered voter rolls — 200,000 in the last two years.
Oregon is the only state that operates entirely by mail-in ballot. The deadline for registering was extended until midnight Tuesday. In the 11th hour, Bradbury said thousands of registration forms were turned in, the vast majority from the Bush-Cheney campaign.
In Colorado, accusations are flying over fraudulent voter registration forms handled by the left-wing group known as ACORN. In Denver, up to 100 forms with forged names or the same names on several different forms have been detected. ACORN, which stands for Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now (search), paid employees $2 per voter application.
One man said he registered 35 times to help employees earn more money. One woman admitted forging three people's names on about 40 registration forms in order to earn more money.
"You pay someone that kind of incentive for volume, their natural reaction to that is go out and get lots of volume because everyone is going to be two or three dollars," said Adams County Clerk Carol Snyder.
Colorado election officials issued a warning on Wednesday telling people if they knowingly violate election law by registering or voting fraudulently, the state will come after them.
"I will fight and hopefully make sure the DAs or the AG prosecutes those individuals," said Colorado Secretary of State Donetta Davidson.
In addition to Colorado, voting challenges are pending in Michigan, Ohio, Missouri, Florida, South Dakota and Pennsylvania.
In Ohio, a dispute over voter registration forms ensued over forms filled out on paper that didn't meet state standards. Threats to reject the forms were later withdrawn, but Ohio's secretary of state said he is being dogged over the provisional balloting system that he says was enacted 10 years ago.
"There are rabble rousers and anarchists who sort of thrive on confusion and chaos, like Jesse Jackson, who would rather this issue not be determined by the ballot box," said Ohio Secretary of State Ken Blackwell.
Voters in 30 states, like Tennessee, which began accepting absentee ballots on Wednesday, are already casting their ballots, raising the stakes on whether rules and regulations are implemented.
Company Accused of Trashing Voter Registrations
WASHINGTON — As the election approaches, the catalogue of complaints about registration and voting irregularities is already growing.
Democrats on Wednesday cried foul over a company hired by the Republican National Committee that stands accused of shredding hundreds of voter registration forms filled out by Democrats in Las Vegas.
"Why is the Republican National Committee funding an organization who is ripping up voter registration forms of Democrats?" asked Democratic National Committee Chairman Terry McAuliffe.
A report by Las Vegas television station KLAS-TV quoted company employees who said they witnessed the destruction of hundreds of forms from potential Democratic voters. The head of the elections division in Clark County, where the allegations surfaced, said he saw photocopies of three voter registration forms that had been shredded and then taped back together. Of the three, one person was already registered to vote in the county.
Nevada's secretary of state is investigating the allegations.
The RNC confirmed to FOX News that it had paid the company to register voters. It also released this statement: "The Republican Party has a zero tolerance policy for anything that smacks of improprieties in registering voters. Anyone who engages in fraudulent voter registration activities should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law."
Nathan Sproul, an Arizona Republican, told FOX News that he was paid nearly $500,000 by the Republican National Committee to register voters. He subcontracted Voter Outreach of America (search), among other organizations, to get the job done in Arizona, Nevada and Oregon. Sproul said all of the subcontractors' employees are required to read and sign a "fraud policy" form that explains that tampering with a registration form is a felony and anyone found doing it will be turned over to authorities.
Sproul said all the charges are false and generated by one disgruntled employee who was fired two weeks ago for lying about the number of hours he worked. He said his company took out 4,500 blank voter registration forms in Clark County, Nev., and submitted 2,400 forms. Of those, 1,947 were registered Republican; the rest were Democratic and independent registration forms.
In Oregon, the state attorney general is investigating a similar complaint. A man who claimed to be an employee of Voter Outreach of America told a reporter for KGW-TV that he "might" throw away the forms of people who registered as Democrats. He said he was from the company's "Nevada organization." Sproul said he does not believe Mike Johnson, the man making the accusations, ever worked for the company.
The penalty for "altering" a voter registration form in Oregon is up to five years in prison and a $120,000 fine. Secretary of State Bill Bradbury (search) told FOX News that in his five years in office, he has never seen a complaint like this. Oregon has recently seen a huge increase in registered voter rolls — 200,000 in the last two years.
Oregon is the only state that operates entirely by mail-in ballot. The deadline for registering was extended until midnight Tuesday. In the 11th hour, Bradbury said thousands of registration forms were turned in, the vast majority from the Bush-Cheney campaign.
In Colorado, accusations are flying over fraudulent voter registration forms handled by the left-wing group known as ACORN. In Denver, up to 100 forms with forged names or the same names on several different forms have been detected. ACORN, which stands for Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now (search), paid employees $2 per voter application.
One man said he registered 35 times to help employees earn more money. One woman admitted forging three people's names on about 40 registration forms in order to earn more money.
"You pay someone that kind of incentive for volume, their natural reaction to that is go out and get lots of volume because everyone is going to be two or three dollars," said Adams County Clerk Carol Snyder.
Colorado election officials issued a warning on Wednesday telling people if they knowingly violate election law by registering or voting fraudulently, the state will come after them.
"I will fight and hopefully make sure the DAs or the AG prosecutes those individuals," said Colorado Secretary of State Donetta Davidson.
In addition to Colorado, voting challenges are pending in Michigan, Ohio, Missouri, Florida, South Dakota and Pennsylvania.
In Ohio, a dispute over voter registration forms ensued over forms filled out on paper that didn't meet state standards. Threats to reject the forms were later withdrawn, but Ohio's secretary of state said he is being dogged over the provisional balloting system that he says was enacted 10 years ago.
"There are rabble rousers and anarchists who sort of thrive on confusion and chaos, like Jesse Jackson, who would rather this issue not be determined by the ballot box," said Ohio Secretary of State Ken Blackwell.
Voters in 30 states, like Tennessee, which began accepting absentee ballots on Wednesday, are already casting their ballots, raising the stakes on whether rules and regulations are implemented.
Media, ducks, and evil
These fucking debates… [read the transcript if you didn’t see it.]
Let me set aside my critiques of the candidates for a moment to attack our media and the debates themselves. Let’s start with the debates. First, I have a new policy… let the people ask the fucking questions! The town hall had the best questions by far out of any of the debates. If you noticed, I only went into the first 14 questions because I figured I’d get to cover the domestic stuff with this debate.
Not so!
Where were the questions on:
These were the questions:
Let’s do a further breakdown. There were:
Do you know what that equals out to? A whole lot of fucking bullshit answers and wasted time, that’s what.
And where is our ‘Fair and Balanced’ media? Anyone remember the 2000 election and all the criticisms of Gore being uncomfortable or smirking or whatever? Bush shouted down a moderator, he was nervous and fidgety, he told us not to trust leading news sources… WHERE ARE YOU GUYS????? Saturday Night Live should be having a fucking FIELD DAY with this, never mind every fucking pundit in the country! But no! Hear that? That’s the sound of sycophants sucking his presidential pee-pee in every major media outlet from sea to shining sea.
It’s easy to rip into the candidates (and I’m going to get to that in my next few blogs when I go through all the questions and such again) but I think it’s important that we take a moment to recognize what an utter sham these debates have been and moreover, the entire media is.
"Our liberty depends on the freedom of the press, and that cannot be limited without being lost" -Thomas Jefferson, 1786
"If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands."
Douglas Noel Adams - Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency, 1987
Let me set aside my critiques of the candidates for a moment to attack our media and the debates themselves. Let’s start with the debates. First, I have a new policy… let the people ask the fucking questions! The town hall had the best questions by far out of any of the debates. If you noticed, I only went into the first 14 questions because I figured I’d get to cover the domestic stuff with this debate.
Not so!
Where were the questions on:
- Gas prices
- Stem cell research
- Energy policy
- Transportation policy
- Outsourcing [they dodged it]
- Environment
- Defense spending
- Education [though Bush brought it up, it wasn’t it’s own topic]
- Faith-based initiatives
These were the questions:
- Will our children be as safe as we were? – a total nod to the foreign policy debates and the nature of this election… that’s all well and good but we’ve done about 2 hours on that shit. MOVE ON!
- How did the U.S. end up with a flu vaccine shortage? - the first question about health care.
- With rising costs, how do you keep from raising taxes? - the first question about taxes.
- What do you say to someone who lost his job? - the first question about jobs.
- Is Bush entirely to blame for loss of jobs? - the second question about jobs.
- Do you believe homosexuality is a choice? - the first question about gay rights.
- How does Kerry handle criticism from Catholic archbishops? - ok, while the was an interesting question, it’s something I want to hear on meet the press, not during the presidential debate. The POINT of a goddamn debate is to raise topics both sides can battle over. This really isn’t one. I know our President doesn’t know it, but we have a separation of church and state in this country. Religion and religious stance should not enter into the debates, not in this sort of question. You can argue each other’s stances on issues but not each other’s emotional state!
- Who is responsible for the rising costs of health care? - the second question about health care.
- How are Kerry’s new heath care initiatives going to be funded? - the third question about health care.
- How are you going to fix social security? - the first question on Social Security.
- How are you going to fund fixing social security? - the second question on Social Security.
- Talk about immigration. - the first question about immigration.
- Will you raise minimum wage? - the third question about jobs.
- What will you do about Roe v. Wade? - the first question about abortion rights.
- What will you do about the ‘back door draft’ that is in place right now? - the first question about the military.
- Why did the President fail to encourage the continuance of the assault weapons ban? - the first question about gun control.
- Do we still need Affirmative Action? - the first question about affirmative action.
- What part does your faith play on your policy decisions? - Like I said before, separation of church and state… honestly, I think this should be an indictment of Bush for letting his faith guide his policy but whatever. This was, arguably, a more valid point than the archbishop one.
- How would you unite the polarized nation? - the first question about unification and nationalism.
- What did you learn from vaginas? - a total bullshit and throwaway question that pissed me off to no end.
Let’s do a further breakdown. There were:
- 3 health care questions
- 3 job questions
- 2 throwaway religious bullshit questions (and I say this because issues like abortion, stem cell research, faith-based initiatives, and others could have provided the requisite pandering to the Christian coalition)
- 2 social security questions
- 1 foreign policy/arguably homeland security question left over from the previous debates
- 1 tax question
- 1 gay rights question
- 1 immigration question
- 1 abortion question
- 1 draft/armed forces question
- 1 gun control question
- 1 affirmative action question
- 1 unification question
- 1 totally bullshit emotional pandering question
Do you know what that equals out to? A whole lot of fucking bullshit answers and wasted time, that’s what.
And where is our ‘Fair and Balanced’ media? Anyone remember the 2000 election and all the criticisms of Gore being uncomfortable or smirking or whatever? Bush shouted down a moderator, he was nervous and fidgety, he told us not to trust leading news sources… WHERE ARE YOU GUYS????? Saturday Night Live should be having a fucking FIELD DAY with this, never mind every fucking pundit in the country! But no! Hear that? That’s the sound of sycophants sucking his presidential pee-pee in every major media outlet from sea to shining sea.
It’s easy to rip into the candidates (and I’m going to get to that in my next few blogs when I go through all the questions and such again) but I think it’s important that we take a moment to recognize what an utter sham these debates have been and moreover, the entire media is.
"Our liberty depends on the freedom of the press, and that cannot be limited without being lost" -Thomas Jefferson, 1786
"If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands."
Douglas Noel Adams - Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency, 1987
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