Much to the surprise of conspiracy theorists and staunch republicans the world around, Osama Bin Laden released another tape just 4 short days before the election. He told US citizens that it doesn't matter who we elect as president. What matters is we stay out of the affairs of Muslim nations and don't threaten their security. He said ordered the 9/11 attacks because of injustices against the Lebanese and Palestinians by Israel and the United States.
So......... can we just go back to the isolationist policies of pre-Pearl Harbor WWII and just concern ourselves with our own nation, please? I'd rather be safe than the police of the world, kay? Thanks. Neogotiating with terrorists this is not. Just let the Muslim world do it's own thing.
Oh, fuck. I forgot. They have the oil. Never mind, the SUVs demand we must continue the 30-year plan.
DRILL ALASKA!
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